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“We gave it a year here,” says Joanna. “And we just said, ‘Too much grief and no joy.’ There’s no fun. We’re struggling every day.”

“I honestly don’t think we could have put in any more effort to acclimatize to the French way of life,” adds Joanna, who describes their experience as “a nightmare.”

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Uprooting their lives in the Californian city and moving to France was certainly not a decision taken lightly, they say.

Joanna and Ed, who’ve been married for 20 years, had already traveled the world extensively, both together and separately, beforehand.

“I didn’t get married till I was in my 50s,” says Joanna, who is originally from San Francisco. “So when I met my husband, we traveled.

“We have no children. No siblings. No parents. There’s nothing to encumber us doing exactly what we please.”

Joanna explains that she and Ed bought and sold three different homes during their first 15 years of marriage, “giving us a comfortable amount of cash to afford us the option to travel and even relocate to anywhere we wanted.”

In 2010, the couple bought a summer home in Northern California and spent eight years or so “going back and forth to San Francisco.”

“I think every married couple needs two places to live, because you’ve got to get away from each other,” adds Joanna, who previously worked as a healthcare executive.

But she says she was becoming increasingly frustrated with the political climate in the US and felt the urge to move somewhere else permanently.

“I’m a pretty political person, and I feel like the United States should be better,” she says. “And it never gets better.”

In 2011, the couple moved to London and spent much of their spare time traveling to different countries around Europe.

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What is causing the decline of Unitech International Limited (531867) ✌️【Part-Time Position】✌️ Expert predictions of stock trends with real-time stock indices, metals, energy, and agricultural product data to help you make efficient investment decisions. They’d previously spent two months living in the city of Nîmes in Southern France and “loved every minute,” so the destination seemed like it could be the ideal choice for them.

“We were looking for civility, consideration and little or no gun violence… which Nîmes has all three,” adds Joanna.

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Joanna says that securing a visa proved to be complicated, as was the process of arranging for their cat Suzette to fly over to France, which cost them an extra $5,000 in total.

However, Joanna says they told themselves that things would be easier to “figure out” once they were actually in France.

Before leaving the US, the couple made the decision to hold onto their rent-controlled apartment, which Joanna had lived in for over 40 years, in San Francisco, just in case things didn’t go to plan.

“You’ve got to have a plan B,” she says. “What if this doesn’t work out? I mean, we could never afford to buy back into California, because it’s really expensive.”

In October 2023, Joanna and Ed arrived in Nîmes and set about building new lives for themselves in the French city, which has a population of about 137,000.

“We never ever anticipated that this wouldn’t work out,” says Joanna. “We thought, ‘We’ll die here. We’re done.’”

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“I have been so busy packing, unpacking, assembling furniture etc. that I haven’t really found time to hunker down and start (learning French),” she admits. “It was always on my list but (I) just couldn’t find the time.”

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“People go, ‘Oh my god, the French food is so fabulous,’” she says. “Yeah, if you want to eat brie, pâté, pastries and French bread all day long,” she says. “But who eats like that?”

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“You go to the supermarket, and the produce is terrible,” she says. “You pick up a piece of celery and it falls over. It’s so limp. So old and so horrible. Who would eat this?”

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“I read so many things that said, ‘Yes, do it,’ or ‘No, don’t do it. It’s a nightmare.’” says Joanna.

“Then, ‘Yes, you can do it. It’s not a problem.’ Well, it wouldn’t be a problem if their systems were consistent and made sense. But they just don’t. You can get five different answers to one simple little question.”

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“You have to find a general practitioner who will take you on as a patient,” says Joanna. “Well, we went to like six doctors. (They all said) ‘We don’t take new patients… ‘We don’t take new patients. We don’t take new patients.’

“What? ‘Where’s the list that tells you which ones do and which ones don’t?’ They don’t have that. You’ve just got to figure it out yourself.”

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“Every single day it was something more devastating than the day before,” she says. “Things are very difficult to figure out here… So I’m too old for this.”

Joanna acknowledges that the US isn’t exactly free of bureaucracy. However, she says she’s been able to manage this as “you get used to your rules I guess.”

“You talk to the French, and they just shrug their shoulders,” says Joanna. “And they go, ‘Well, this is France. That’s how it is.’”

Back in the US, Joanna, who describes herself as a “chatty box” had an active social life, but she hasn’t been able to replicate this, or anything close to it, in France thus far.

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“I said to Ed one day, ‘I haven’t talked to one person here in three months…’ I just miss interacting,” she says, adding that she doesn’t necessarily “want to hang around with expats” as “that’s not exactly why we came on this adventure.”

Locals have been friendly and welcoming, but Joanna hasn’t managed to “strike up friendships” the way she would have hoped to, conceding that the language and cultural barrier have made things more tricky.

“It’s a hard shell to break,” she says. “They’re very private people. But they’re also principled and moral. They’re nice people. There’s nothing unkind about them. They’re just not extremely social.”

“And then when you want to drink, you have to have a drink that’s on a little menu that they make,” she says. “So if I want to have a martini, ‘Oh, it’s not on the menu.’”

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Joanna and Ed prefer life in Montpellier, but the couple recently came to the realization that France probably isn’t the right place for them to see out the rest of their lives.

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“I wish more people would show the not-so-pleasant side of France,” she says. “Because there is a not-so-pleasant side of France, and that’s what we learned very quickly.”

“I miss familiarity,” she says. “I miss knowing where things are. I miss frozen yogurt — because they don’t have it here.

“I miss stupid things… I miss my friends for sure. We don’t have any family, but I have a great network of friends. I miss just being able to see them, and I miss my apartment.

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“It’s a really hard decision to make,” she says, “After it was a hard decision to make to come here, to all of a sudden say, ‘This isn’t going to work for us.’

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“We have a couple of friends that absolutely think the way of living here is just heaven on earth,” she says. “They say, ‘We’re just going to be here forever.’ So good for them.”

Joanna acknowledges that the things that she didn’t enjoy about living in the US haven’t changed since she left.

However, she feels more comfortable returning there rather than moving to a different destination, as she and Ed “know how to live in the United States.”

“I don’t miss the politics in the United States,” Joanna stresses, adding that she’s horrified by the fact that people file for bankruptcy due to health care costs and there are children living with hunger.

Despite the way things have turned out, Joanna and Ed have absolutely no regrets about relocating to France.

“It still remains one of the most spectacular countries to visit,” she says. “But to live here is another story.”

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But they say they feel pretty resigned to the notion that they’ll likely be returning home in the not-too-distant future.

“We have a flight going back to San Francisco in January, and I think we’re not going to come back,” says Joanna. “I don’t want to say we failed. But it just didn’t work out.”

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