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“I knew I was ready to retire, and I was afraid I wouldn’t be able to, maybe for potentially many more years if I stayed in the States,” Madeline, originally from Elko, Nevada, tells 【 - Free Access to Community 】 Travel.
Her husband, who’d lived in Germany during his childhood, had “always wanted to move back to Europe” and Madeline became more open to this idea when “politics in the US got more intolerant.”
Jim, an IT professor who previously taught in countries such as Iraq, got his wish when they relocated to Spain in September 2019.
“It was feasible for us to retire early on his social security, sell our house, move here and live a good life,” she says. “And that’s what we did.”
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Looking back on the circumstances that led to their move, Madeline, who has two children from her first marriage, explains that they had initially looked into moving to Germany, where Jim had many fond memories.
“Germany didn’t want us because we were old, retired people,” she explains, adding that they also considered South America and Portugal before deciding on Spain.
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“I’m interested in classical music, and Valencia has a really strong music culture,” she explains, adding that they found the locals to be “really friendly” and loved how walkable the city was. “There’s a lot of art. And my husband liked the climate here.”
On returning to the US, Madeline and Jim began the process of applying for a non-lucrative visa, which allows non-EU nationals to live in Spain without working provided that they can prove that they have enough money to support themselves, and looking for a property in Spain.
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“I was not allowed to take any vacation really once I declared that I was retiring,” she explains, adding that her husband, who had already retired by that point, traveled back and forth from Vermont to Valencia to get things “lined up” while she finished up at work.
“We packed up as soon as I was done,” she says. “I went and visited my kids down in the Boston area for a week. And then off we went.”
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“They’re adults, and they like to travel,” she says. “They thought it was pretty cool that I was moving someplace that they would get to come to.
“And to be honest, Spain is actually easier to get to from the East Coast, than the West Coast was for us to go visit their grandparents. So it’s not as difficult as it first seems.”
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“I had just retired,” she adds. “So there was a little bit of that feeling — you’re kind of restless when you first retire.
“I was really looking forward to it. But so much of your identity is wrapped up in your work… and now just I’m just hanging out. It kind of felt weird.”
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“Everybody was interested in being my language teacher, which is great,” she says, explaining that they both ended up enrolling in different language schools.
“And then having dogs, you really meet a lot more people that way too. That was a good opportunity to practice Spanish…
“There were so many more human connections here than I was getting in the US, even in a small town.”
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“We were pretty much locked up until June,” she says. “So that was interesting. And I was glad we were here.
“It really made me feel, in many ways, more a part of the community, because we had all gone through this together.”
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“It was a really bad diagnosis,” says Madeline. “And so after that, because he was getting various forms of therapy that diminished his immunity to communicable disease, we really had to curtail our life.
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“The healthcare is so much more consistent and better and cheaper here,” she says, stressing that they had every confidence in the Spanish health care system, which the couple were able to access by paying a small fee premium each month.
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Fortunately, Madeline and Jim happened to be living close to a specialist hospital, which Madeline had previously noticed while walking their dogs during the pandemic.
“So he was treated there, and it was state of the art, everything,” says Madeline. “It was fantastic. And if we’d been in Vermont, we would have been living in a rural area.
“It was a 40-minute drive to the nearest real medical center. So it would have been much more difficult.”
“I think with the expense of having a terminal cancer diagnosis in the States, I would have been working into my 70s to pay that off,” she adds.
Being in Spain ultimately meant that they had to go through Jim’s illness without having close family around them, but Madeline stresses that the close bonds they formed in Valencia meant that it felt “pretty darn close.”
Jim died just days before Christmas in 2022. Madeline initially chose only to tell their family, so as not to “be sending bad news at Christmas time.”
However, she later decided to reach out to some of the Muslim students Jim had taught in Iraq, as she “wouldn’t be ruining a holiday for them” and was thrilled to receive calls from three of them.
“Talking to young people in a developing country to whom he was very important. That was really wonderful. So, in a weird way, I have some very good memories of that Christmas.”
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“I really hadn’t mentioned it to anybody around that he’d died,” she says, adding that “everybody knew he was sick.”
“Every business I went by, the proprietor came out, gave me a hug, told me how sorry they were, asked if there was anything they could do. It was incredible.
“And I think the support I had from people far away, from people nearby, made that so much easier than it could have been.
“And I’m not sure it would have been like that in the US, even in the town I lived in in Vermont for six years.”
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“We had discussed that in theory, because he was older than I was,” she says. “And he said, ‘I hope that you can get comfortable enough there that when I die… You will just stay there, because I would love to think of you thriving there.’
“And I said, ‘Well, we’ll just have to see what happens’. And by the time he got sick, I was like, ‘There is no way I’m going back.’ So he got to hear me say that.”
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“There’s one shopping center I can’t even go to anymore, just because it was right next to the hospital,” Madeline says. “And the times that I had to run errands over there to get stuff were pretty horrible.”
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“This kind of is the life we had envisioned,” she says. “I’m just doing it alone. And that is life. I mean, it could have been me who died, and I expect he would have carried on. Because, what else can you do?”
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“It was empowering, in a way,” she says. “Because I was able to manage, and it gave me a lot of confidence for going ahead here alone. Or sort of alone.”
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“I think the hardest thing for a lot of Americans in Spain, is that Spaniards socialize with their families much more than with friends,” she says.
“So it took us a while. My husband was really against hanging out with expats… And I was like, ‘Jim, we’re not going to hang out with anybody unless we start hanging out with some expats,’ Which we did.”
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“We really hit it off,” she says. “I’m like an aunt for them. It’s a lot of fun. They’re lovely to me.”
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“I think that the biggest gift that retirement has given me is not being tied to a demanding schedule,” she says.
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“It’s a beautiful thing when you have dogs,” she says. “I’m glad I do. They’re a lot of work. But they definitely made me keep going. “
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“I’d like to go see snow sometime,” she says. “So some of it is the seasons. Seeing my kids, that’s the biggest thing.
“And old friends. Because I do have a lot of old friends there. But beyond that, not really that much.”
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